Handed in my DPJ (Design Process Journal) today. Today was also the last "official" day of school for us although some of us still have to go back for some stuff every now and then, but it was generally the last day of the semester for the majority. Felt kind of weird today after handing in my DPJ. A sort of strangeness, like suddenly I don't have any work to do in the afternoon. Furthermore, the whole school was really quiet because everyone finished school about a week before. So it was just a really quiet, sunny, and peaceful Monday afternoon in school. To think of it, I'm getting this weird tingly feeling (now I sound like The Fimbles) all over. Unexplainable feelings have been coming over me recently. I think I'm going out of my mind.
You know how sometimes we all get this sense of deja vu every once in awhile? Mine just doesn't seem to come once in awhile anymore. It's starting to happen so frequently that even when I'm hanging my clothes, I'll suddenly get this feeling that I've been in the exact same situation and doing the exact same thing. But maybe living 21 years of my life on Earth, everything has probably been done twice over and no experience is new anymore. I remember the very first time I felt this strange sense of deja vu was when I was Primary 3 and looking through my Pets coursebook, when I stumbled upon this cartoon drawing of a single house surrounded by fields and just one single winding lane leading up to it. From that point onwards, everytime I come across images of narrow country lanes or peaceful and quiet country lanes amidst fields, and while the sky is clear and the sun is shining brightly, I would feel some sort of weird feeling come over me. A feeling which cannot be described, as much as I've tried. Like some cort of weird connection to a place. Recently I was looking through the website for this new movie, Elizabethtown, the background of the site featured something similar to what I'm describing, and it brought back the all-too-familiar feeling.
Also recently, I've started to wonder, all of a sudden while doing something totally unrelated, how a person on the other side of the world would be feeling and what he/she might be doing at the exact same time as it is here in Singapore. And then the strange, unexplainable feeling would come back. I really AM going out of my mind. Not 2 days ago, I was watching TV and suddenly the word Budapest popped into my mind. No idea why. I certainly wasn't thinking about it because I totally would not think of Budapest as it's not that familiar a name as say...England, or America. Strange. Strange. Strange.
Back to school stuff. Yesterday I spent the whole afternoon doing my DPJ layouts and the inexplicably worse thing that could happen:
My laptop ran out of memory space and my computer jammed and the whole screen was a blank for over an hour.
You cannot imagine how frustrated I was. It felt good yelling at the computer though, although it doesn't really help anything. But yelling and screaming at the computer and throwing my stuff all over my room does help release all the stress and frustrations that have accumulated within the past weeks in school. At one point I got really angry with God, which I shouldn't have because it really isn't His fault. Sorry God.
After printing my stuff and I was on my way back, I was listening to Jars of Clay and this song "Jesus's Blood Never Failed Me Yet" came on, and it got me thinking about how whenever God closes the door, He opens a window. At the printing shop, my whole document opened to a blank so I had to change my whole format. But at least I had another alternative and that was to go over to Popular and purchase a blank book to paste my images in. It might not be as nice as my previous idea, but there really wasn't any time left. At least it was something. And I'm also thankful that Alvin opened his printing shop till late yesterday even though it was a Sunday and he rarely opens on Sundays. Jesus's blood never failed me yet, and it's not about to.
The DPJ turned out alright in the end. It had everything that it was supposed to have. Well, it's submitted already anyway. Nothing I can do about it.
As a class, we had a thrashing session with Kelly today. Seems there was alot of underlying tension between the two classes and so Kelly sat all of us down and requested everyone to voice out their grievances so that this year can be closed properly, and we can all start next sem on a clean slate. Sigh. Problems like these will never go away. The problem with my class and the next class is that we have alot of outspoken people. There is bound to be friction somewhere along the road. It's inevitable. I just don't know why some people get themselves so bogged down by all the negativities. Just live and let live.
Tomorrow is another day at school. Some of us were selected to put up our final models and presentation boards for the dean to look through, and for him to gauge an idea of what we as a faculty have been doing for the first semester. For me, Kelly just wants my model. I really think it's a big waste of my time to go all the way down to school and place my model in the room and say bye. Maybe I shall go hunting for cheap games to play.