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Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Signs You've Been Online For Too Long

1. Tech Support calls "YOU" for help.

2. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say "LOL" out loud.

3. You find yourself trying to cock your head 90 degrees when you smile.

4. When at work, your boss constantly reminds you that the word i should be capitalized.

5. When someone says, "What did you say?" you reply, "Scroll up!"

6. You turn down the lights & close the blinds so people won't know you're on-line again.

7. You have an identity crisis if someone is using a screen name close to your own.

8. Your dog leaves you.

9. You bring a bag lunch and a cooler to the computer.

10. You go through "withdrawal" if you are away from the computer for more than a few hours.

11. You wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is get online before you have your first cup of coffee.

12. You have to inject no-doze into your butt to keep it awake.

13. You end sentences with 3 (or more) periods while writing letters by hand.

14. You get up at 2 am to go to the bathroom but turn on the computer instead.

15. You type faster than you think.

16. You want to be buried with your computer when it dies or vice versa.

17. People say, "If it weren't for your super reflexes in your eyes and fingers, you would have been classified as a vegetable!"

18. You dream in "text".

19. You double click your TV remote.

20. You can now type over 70 wpm.

21. You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to everyone in a room.

22. You stop speaking in full sentences.

23. You have gone into an unstaffed Tech Support room and ended up "giving" tech support to other AOLers.

24. You have to be pried from your computer by the "Jaws of Life".

25. You set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted to "check your mail" and while there you "just wanted to see who was online."

26. You no longer type with proper capitalization, punctuation, or complete sentences.

written at
|2:41 PM|


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